A Week in the Life: Jennifer, in-house with two kids.

In this week's post, Jennifer reflects on WFH life versus time in the office, bike commutes, and working for a company with European norms. She also shares how they have freed up their weekend.

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Editor Note: This is a really wonderful reflection from Jennifer. I love her thoughts on how she and her husband navigate household labour and childcare, and her reflections on how they’ve prioritized short commutes and walkability.

What’s your job situation?

In-house, lawyer-adjacent. My company is global but based in Europe with many European norms like 35 hour work weeks, summer Fridays, very flexible hours, and liberal use of vacation days by my coworkers. My mornings can be a little crazy because of the time change but that means my afternoons are very light. I work from home three days a week, in office two, a schedule I really like. My boss, who is not in my location, has made it clear he doesn't care where I work but I like coming to the office for interaction and a change of scenery. My husband has a similar ish job, but works from home three to four days a week. We live in an east coast city, in the city, so neither of us do a car commute, which is nice. Between us, we try to take care of all home chores (laundry, grocery shopping, tidying between cleaner visits) during our WFH days so on the weekends we can focus on the kids, relaxing, and doing fun stuff. 

What’s your kid/family situation?

City provides free prek, which is amazing. One kid in that program, one in K, at the same school. School hours are 8:30 to 3:15 and then they are in aftercare, which goes to 6PM. We alternate drop off and husband usually does pick up around 5PM. Grandparents, both sets about two hours away, provide occasional coverage on days off and in summer, otherwise we use local camps or plan vacation. Sick days, etc, we use flex time which is usually no problem but does require some deconfliction. 

A Week in the Life

Monday

I bike to the gym this morning for a class- I get out the door at 6:15 and am back home by 7:30. Kids were awake before I left and have already eaten breakfast and brushed teeth, so are playing a game. Normally a work from home day for me but I have a meeting with lots of external partners so head into work while husband takes the kids to school (he does pick up and drop off on days I go to the office). I bike and it's a nice ride. I keep shoes, pants, and a few blazers at the office so I only have to pack a blouse, and I luckily do not really sweat much ever. Very few people come in on Monday so it's fairly quiet. I head home in the afternoon and my husband and I log on to do virtual parent teacher conferences- two positive reports which are really nice to hear. I make dinner (new recipe- fine but will not repeat) while husband gets kids from school. After dinner, he cleans up the kitchen and walks the dog while I get the kids ready for bed, then he heads out to trivia with friends. I read and try to get to sleep by 10PM.

Tuesday

We would all like to sleep till 7AM but the kids are up earlier and after a few reminders to be quiet, play quietly in their room till breakfast. I bike to work and husband takes kids to school. I have a couple of meetings but my focus is not great this morning and I bounce between reading material instead of finishing up a project.  A productive meeting in the afternoon kind of turns things around and I hop on my bike to head home. I start dinner while husband gets the kids. Both are grumpy and tired when they get home and getting through dinner is a bit of a slog. 

Wednesday

My day to walk the kids to school. I generally really enjoy our walks as it's fun to chat with them on the way, and then say hi to various parents when we arrive- makes me feel good about the community. I start a new episode of a podcast I really like on the walk back. Work is fine but in the afternoon I get a call that the dishwasher repair scheduled for tomorrow is being rescheduled and am full of despair since this is the third time they've put us off. My husband does 95% of the dishes so this is worse news for him. I call the appliance company and ask for a price adjustment, which they grant, so that makes me feel a little better. Early afternoon swim lessons for kid #1, then I grab kid #2 on the way back home. Husband has dinner ready so we eat, do baths, and then the bedtime routine.

Thursday

Another class at my gym in the morning. I walk the kids to school and then I have the house to myself today, which is delightful, as normally my husband and my WFH days overlap but today he's going in. I am glued to my seat all morning in meetings but break around noon to do laundry and eat lunch. Afternoon I work, tidy up, and text with some school mom friends about some teacher drama. I prep dinner while husband grabs kids on his way home from work- when they get home, he takes over cooking while I read to my oldest on the couch, kid is grumpy and not feeling well. After dinner I take the kids upstairs to get ready for bed, he cleans up the kitchen and then takes the dog for a walk. We text about what we want to eat for dinner next week while he's walking and I make the grocery list and put in a pickup order.

Friday

I log on early today because I plan to go to the gym over lunch, then I have a hair appt and want to go grocery shopping. It looks like rain so husband drives us to school and I run the kids in.  Oldest is still not feeling well but improves dramatically when engaged in something, and with a spoonful of medicine. I work, run errands in the afternoon, then husband picks kids up. Friday nights are cheese plate, cocktails (pandemic habit that stuck), and homemade pizza. After the kids go to bed he plays video games with his brother while I facetime a college friend. 

The Weekend

A pretty low key weekend, which is nice after a lot of previous travel but I'm hoping to get invited to birthday parties or something to fill up the rest of the month- I like having lots of social activities. Saturday morning we have kid activities, the afternoon we spend at our local library picking out books and doing a craft. My youngest has been talking a lot about being a "flower grower" and I remember I have an old seed kit, so we take that out and get it started. We really try to limit screen time but they usually get about an hour or two each day on the weekend so we can cook dinner in peace. On Sunday I make a new muffin recipe which is a big hit with the kids but a little too sugary for my taste, then we head to the local botanic garden. Sunday afternoon our eldest has a bit of an attitude meltdown so it's a pretty quiet afternoon at home. I meet friends for dinner at a trendy restaurant I’ve wanted to try which cheers me up after dealing with attitude all afternoon.

Reflections

What was your biggest success this week?

I helped my company navigate a tricky issue, which felt like a win, although unfortunately the issue isn't going away anytime soon. It was also really nice to get positive reports from the kids teachers about both their social and academic performance.

What was your biggest obstacle?

The Sunday attitude meltdown from my oldest was a real bummer and put a damper on the weekend.  Stuff like that always makes me question how good I am as a parent. Also the dishwasher still being broken lol.  Price adjustments are great and all but I would actually prefer a working dishwasher.

How are you making it work?

WFH days and an equal partner are key. Pre-pandemic I was in the office five days a week and I am so thankful that is not the norm in my industry anymore. Also, I appreciate my husband taking on his fair share around the house and with the kids without having constant conversations about it. We both like cooking and eating, so are both fairly enthusiastic about meal planning and every Sunday we try to check in about the week to make sure we’re all on the same page and deconflict work commitments, social events, extracurriculars, etc. Finally, we do not live in the best neighborhood, or send our kid to the best schools (decent neighborhood public school is just fine), or live in the biggest house- we made the deliberate choice to prioritize short commutes, walkability, and convenience to make our lives easier.